Limited Time
I want to get a little something out but I have a limited time so it will be messy and probably have a lot of errors!
I feel like shit right now and I don't know why. I keep getting in these little funks that just leave me pissed off all the time. I am afraid I will blow a gasket at someone who does not deserve it. I find myself getting this way every few months or so. Maybe even more frequently. I don't like my job, I don't like my kids. I don't like my relationships, I don't like myself! Maybe it's the stress and my lack of being proactive about alleviating it. Maybe it's the fact that I am becoming increasingly sedentary. Maybe it's the horrible Florida climate. I don't know!
What I do know is that it started yesterday or the day before and it will probably last through the weekend. I will do my best to hide it and not let anyone who has to spend time with me know that inside I hate the world and everything about it. But I am scared that something will happen that will blow my cover and I will hurt someones feelings. Times like this I feel it's best to just curl up in a ball in my room and not speak to anyone. But I don't know if that will make it go away more quickly or fester and last longer.
I know in my brain that there is no reason for this anger or frustration, what ever you want to call it. But in my head it rages on and will not let go! If you are close to me and I do something stupid to make you mad at me this weekend or in the week ahead, please forgive me in advance.
Oh well. Time to go pretend to everyone listening to our fabulous Christian radio station that I am happy and perfect!
I feel like shit right now and I don't know why. I keep getting in these little funks that just leave me pissed off all the time. I am afraid I will blow a gasket at someone who does not deserve it. I find myself getting this way every few months or so. Maybe even more frequently. I don't like my job, I don't like my kids. I don't like my relationships, I don't like myself! Maybe it's the stress and my lack of being proactive about alleviating it. Maybe it's the fact that I am becoming increasingly sedentary. Maybe it's the horrible Florida climate. I don't know!
What I do know is that it started yesterday or the day before and it will probably last through the weekend. I will do my best to hide it and not let anyone who has to spend time with me know that inside I hate the world and everything about it. But I am scared that something will happen that will blow my cover and I will hurt someones feelings. Times like this I feel it's best to just curl up in a ball in my room and not speak to anyone. But I don't know if that will make it go away more quickly or fester and last longer.
I know in my brain that there is no reason for this anger or frustration, what ever you want to call it. But in my head it rages on and will not let go! If you are close to me and I do something stupid to make you mad at me this weekend or in the week ahead, please forgive me in advance.
Oh well. Time to go pretend to everyone listening to our fabulous Christian radio station that I am happy and perfect!
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